Pisanije

Unfortunately, even for me, totally normal woman, Youtube sometimes "recommends" videos from people who call themselves "Alpha males" or red pill movement men. I do not want to watch them but I've seen videos who criticize them so I do know what's it all about. It is really weird to me that in this world full of hate, wars, and invented "reasons" to hate anyone or anything, in this short life we all have, someone found the "need" (sorry for too many quotes, I have to show that I do not agree with these) to downgrade our hard-built civilization which was upgraded for centuries with all the hardship, for God-knows which reasons. Now, why do I think this whole idea is wrong? I don't know much about this red-pill movement except for bits I've seen and I have no desire to see more, for my own mental health protection, but from what I've seen, which was enough, I can tell you as a woman few reasons from many of why they are wrong. F...

As someone well over age 50 I learned that it's much easier to attract attention with hate than with love, it's much easier for people to hate or to feel rage than to even try to understand. A lot of people see everything as they are told to see, by media, or internet, or whatever, evil versus good. Nothing in between! Just bad-good, no grey areas. And everything is a shade of grey (nothing to do the famous franchise), there are very little things, events, attitudes, opinions, people, points of view etc that are quite close to 100% evil or 100% good, but none of it is completely there. Sad thing is, although feeling love, gratefulness, being kind and understanding DOES indeed makes us feel better, it is easier to feel rage, hate, anger, mistrust, and refusing to understand, even though all that, on the long run, makes us feel miserable. It's too easy to watch the news and believe one whole nation is just bad, bad people, who should be wiped out, just because, well, people o...

We have all seen these cases. Athletes who were winning all the time, who were on top consistenlty, that lost one time and were suddenly bombed with hate and ridiculed for "being losers". We've seen or known people who were always helping everyone, who were always there for everyone who asks, always giving, always doing things for others. After saying "no" or "I really can't right now" one time, they were reduced to nothing, ditched, banished, hated by everyone. You can't say "no" when you always said "yes", right? That's the curse of being nice or helping or being a "yes" person. You can help hundreds of times, you can give your money away, you could get people out of trouble, but once you decline, for whatever reason, you are the devil. On the other and opposite side are people who do mostly damage, mean, greedy, selfish, even evil. There is something alluring in mean people to the society in general. Look wh...

Bye bye little baby, I cared, I am sorry I didn't help you in time.  

 Over next weeks I am going to give my best to erase most traces of me from the internet, especially social media. I may leave some account deactivated while I decide what to do with them, as I worked a lot on them, and I can't remove my novel from Amazon, and other sites that have my name on it, but as much as I can remove, I will remove. I want googling my name to return as less as possible. I am going away. I want to erase as much traces of me as I can. Maybe I will remove my novel and other novels I put online too, I am still not sure about this but I am thinking of it. No one reads them anyway. Going off the grid is not finished with social media and internet, I am going off in real life too, as much as possible. I am done with most of humanity. I had my fair share of crap received from people, insults, being hurt, being misunderstood, people who hate me but have no fucking idea who I am, rude people, people who want to use me and pretend it's good deed, people who attack ...

 I am not sure if my opinion on my one and only Amazon novel is just too high or the overcrowded marked suffocates it to the point of no existence, probably both, but since my poor blog has people visiting it, I want to try a little self-marketing again. My novel: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09PLQHQKB is still online, and probably drowned in the sea of billions of other books on Amazon. I know that, since English is not my native language, and I wrote this one in Englilsh, it's not the best written novel ever (to put it lightly) but I hope that story and characters are captivating since I invested a lot in developing complex story with many layers and characters which I really hope are believable as people, and that people can relate to them. The idea of the story is, if you coud choose between safe annd comfortable, but boring, predictable and kind of suffocating and fully controled life, and unsafe, dangerous, completely ridiculous and unpredictable but kind of free and exciting l...