Pisanije

Since I write here about everything that's on my mind, this time I will put some of my thoughts about make up and some tips I learned. Of course, those tips will not work for everyone, maybe not even majority, because we are all different, different skin types, different ages, different face shapes and features, skin texture... Of course, what works for someone will not work for others. I started using make up "for real" when covid quarantine started, because, well I had more time than usual. I found some cute make up tutorials online and learned how to pick and use make up, considering my age, features and my finances. While I can not exactly shop in Sephora, I had to research drugstore make up and skin care, but I tried some of the luxury too, just to get to know things. Here is what I learned: 1. Make up is not to impress anyone, not even to attract men (I honestly don't care for that aspect), it is just fun! It's like an art anyone can learn and play with it. ...

"Look at the photo of this young woman next to photo of old woman" - shows photo of young girl of maybe 19-25 with model-like features, so not really someone you can spot on the streets. Sometimes, lately more often, it's AI generated image or illustration because such perfect face (in eyes of society beauty standards only, of course) does not exist. But a lot of times it's a photo of young model. Next to that photo is a photo of usually beautiful middle aged woman, or, as a more contrast, photo of very old woman (it's NEVER a photo of men, because they don't age at all, right?), with wrinkles, saggy skin and everything today considered "yuck" or unwanted. It doesn't matter if the photo is of beautiful middle-aged woman or very old woman over 80, statement is usually the same: "look at the photo of youth on the left, it's upside down triangle shaped, it has V shaped jaw, big eyes with outer corners higher than inner, lifted full mouth an...

It's not going well...  

Unfortunately, even for me, totally normal woman, Youtube sometimes "recommends" videos from people who call themselves "Alpha males" or red pill movement men. I do not want to watch them but I've seen videos who criticize them so I do know what's it all about. It is really weird to me that in this world full of hate, wars, and invented "reasons" to hate anyone or anything, in this short life we all have, someone found the "need" (sorry for too many quotes, I have to show that I do not agree with these) to downgrade our hard-built civilization which was upgraded for centuries with all the hardship, for God-knows which reasons. Now, why do I think this whole idea is wrong? I don't know much about this red-pill movement except for bits I've seen and I have no desire to see more, for my own mental health protection, but from what I've seen, which was enough, I can tell you as a woman few reasons from many of why they are wrong. F...

Social media can be the devil. I admit I enjoy Youtube a lot, there are lots of very enjoyable channels, with quality information, or fun and comedy, or just plain enjoyable. Then, there are the other ones. I really can't tell why I keep getting those on my recommended list because I don't like them, I don't search for them, and I usually mark them as "not interested". Anti-women videos. I took a peak at few of them and it made me sad and angry at the same time. Why people always invent reasons to hate groups of people based on various things? There are hate videos on certain nationalities, races, religions, sexual orientations, whatever you can imagine evil human mind can think of. And of course, there are videos directed at women. Lets be real, I do not condone any type of hate based on gender, nationality, race, traditions, sexual orientation, or whatever type of criteria evil human mind can invent. I don't care for men-hating videos too. I do not think peo...

When we are young, some of us have good genes and have beautiful face and body. That's like minority who fits into beauty standard and beauty standard is forever and for everyone and it's very important. That means you have to be whatever media tells you that is currently beautiful. That can change in time but the point is always similar. Youthful face shaped like upside down triangle, big eyes, tiny perfect nose, plump lips, perfect skin, big hair, slim body but nicely curvy where it should be. For men it's to be tall, muscular, square jaw. "hunter eyes" (whatever that means), nice big white teeth etc. That's beautiful, that's important and that's the goal, right? Old is ugly, small eyes are ugly, bulky or bumpy nose is ugly, small mouth is ugly, square face is ugly, any body but slim is ugly. Right? Wrong! You know what, all that is crap! That's all what we have been taught to believe and think and it's implanted into our brains over tv, medi...

 Since I kind of reached an age of reason, I wanted to have female friends, mythical girlfriends, mythical, powerful female friendship that so many movies, tv series, medias, and now social media on internet talks about. I never had one. Never. Never had a female friend. I watched movies and tv shows about strong women in great friendships that made each other lives richer, fuller, better, that would do anything one for another. But I've never lived anything even close to that. I had some male friends, but there was always a wall between us, sometimes smaller, sometimes big wall, wall between two people desperately trying not to cross any boundaries. Because, no matter if we are not attracted to each other sexually, or in any way but as friends, no matter that it's just a friend intentions from both sides, that wall is kind of always there. It's always a bit awkward, we can not talk about everything, there are topics that we can and topics that we can't talk about. Ther...

 Someone once said we were not meant to see so many faces of people as we see during last couple of decades. Thanks to social media, we are all exposed to way too many people and faces and bodies and way too exposed to seeing our own. It's probably not natural (for mental health) to see yourself every day, multiple times on social media, photos, selfies, and let your looks and you as a person be validated by strangers, by number of likes, by current beauty standards, by comparing yourself to thousands and thousands of faces and bodies you can see on hundreds of cable channels and even more social media networks, especially Instagram and TikTok. Being woman can be really tough. Constantly being bombarded by "theories" how your worth as a person depends on your looks, age and looking expensive, and even by your acting as a person. There are multiple channels where you are taught to behave like a princess, or queen, and how to treat people, and how to treat men, and how to b...

Small reminder to my online novels, "Mima and life on planet Inferno", which you can read for only 3,60$ on Amazon Kindle (illustrations for my novel made by me): https://www.amazon.com/Mima-Planet-Inferno-Biljana-Malesevic-ebook/dp/B09PLQHQKB/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr= and my second online novel on Inkitt, free of charge "The Vortex" (again, my illustration for this novel): https://www.inkitt.com/stories/horror/1008401 and if you prefer short content, there my short stories on Inkitt too: https://www.inkitt.com/BiljanaM

Let me get it straight: I don't believe in "masculine and feminine energy", personally I think it's BS made up so that men could put women "in their place" and make them their personal slaves without any opportunity to complain or escape or have their own opinions and interests, but, not less important, also to make men ashamed if they are not cold, harsh, strong and unemotional 24hours a day every day in life, to make them feel like crap if they "dare" to break, if they love something that's not considered "masculine", if they don't have certain interests or don't make enough money. It goes both ways and it's not good for anyone. Especially for people who do not want to fit into gender stereotypes, or LGBTQ people. You are what you are however you dress or behave, it's still YOU. Nothing can change that. If someone doesn't like you, they don't like you and you should not change your behavior and personality or...

  Part 3: Getting out He was surprised but shrugged his shoulders. "People get used to everything." "You'd be surprised," he added. "Can I see the others you managed to wake up? Maybe I know someone." After the physiotherapy, I looked at the pages on the small computer board with faces and more faces of the awakened. Some people's faces were slightly blurred and had the words "deceased" across them. The whole search was frustrating and sad. The whole planet went to hell and mommy's and daddy's rich children got away with it and the rest of us are just experiments, who can explode at any moment like an old hand grenade. The first time I went outside after getting on my feet was a shock, and not just physically. Before that, I barely got rid of Darko, whom I mentioned earlier as a confused red-haired young man with a beard. Darko seemed to be a little to fond of me, he hanged around me saying the most incredible amounts of the weird...

Part 3: Stem cells Fast forward to the day when I could successfully roll around in a wheelchair, which wasn't even electric, but old-fashioned, with the wheels that I had to push with my hands. My legs were now functional, but not enough to walk on my own. They wouldn't let me out of my cell...ups sorry, I mean hospital room, except when they were driving me for tests, scans, endless needle poking and electrocutions. During those not-so-pleasant tests and treatments, I had the opportunity to take a look at my arms and legs, and even my torso, and it was clear that whatever they did, they managed to rejuvenate my body by at least twenty years. I wasn't optimistic about that because a dark-haired young man, Dr. Marianusic, told me that almost half of the stem cell treatments ended "very, very badly." I didn't want to ask for details. After all, what do I have to lose at my age? After an additional two hundred years of half-life in ice? I became nervous from all...

Part2: I am awake  I ask them to straighten me up, everything hurts from lying down and my eyes are constantly fixed on the not so interesting ceiling. My mind is in an incredible confusion and I have many questions. They carefully pick me up and place me in a wheelchair. This is my life now. I remember being 67 years old. An old woman completely paralyzed, in a wheelchair, who can only blink and squeak a little. Why did they wake me up? The view from the upright position is not much more interesting than the ceiling. Everything around me is white, and it immediately reminds me of a hospital. The smell of antiseptics, steel, alcohol, the whiteness of painted walls and the silvery shine of steel. Doesn't look comforting at all, ice was better. Around me is a group of people, young people, I would say, maybe in their thirties. There are four of them and they are all dressed in sterile white suits from head to toe. Two of them wear complex helmets, like the one I hallucinated that it ...

Part 1: After The End I don't remember the event of the disaster, I don't even remember certain details, segments. That entire short period has been erased from my memory. Only after the end of the world I remember a period of consciousness that I cannot explain, because I was as dead, just as everyone else on earth, frozen forever in a giant block of ice. I didn't panic, which might be understandable in the given situation, I calmly observed the frozen world around me, the glassy walls of the ice cave and the block of ice in which we were all caught like insects in amber. There was little light in there, only a few glimmers that refracted hundreds of times on the icy rocks and penetrated into the open eyes of those of us who met our ends awake and aware. I was freed from everything, feelings, pain, physical needs, even aging, I felt a peace that I had never felt before. The peace of someone who has absolutely nothing left to lose. All I had was the play of lights and shado...

 What is feminism? By one short definition I found it is "feminism, the belief in social, economic, and political equality of the sexes.". Simple and clear enough. I believe it also enabled women to have much more choices in life and how they would want to live. With feminism, not only they were socially equal, could work respectful jobs and earn much more money than before and could vote and be respected as equal members of society, they also got freedom to decide how they want to live their lives. Will they marry or not, will they work or not, have children or not, whatever life they wanted and couldn't have before. So, what is wrong with that? Nothing. Really, it doesn't take away anything from men, rather it gives them a lot, like an equal partner who also can work and earn, someone they can have great conversation without society telling them that women are basically just decorations that can birth children, they are humans! And have feelings, and intellect and a...

Mima and life on planet Inferno My novel "Mima and life on planet Inferno" is online in paperback and kindle version with new covers, made by professional artist Mladen Oljaca (listed as illustrator on page). I wrote hopefully better "blurb" (description) this time, and trying to find ways to promote. It's sf novel about two different worlds and tough choice for protagonist Mima, a high-school teacher living her not-so-best-life, of where to chose to live: safe, comfortable but a bit boring and too sheltered world on her home planet, or crazy, interesting world full of action but also dangerous, dirty, uncomfortable and violent world on another planet. What will she choose? Check it out on Amazon, paperback and Kindle version available! https://www.amazon.com/Mima-Planet-Inferno-Biljana-Malesevic-ebook/dp/B09PLQHQKB/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=

 

This was taken by android camera and the light in room is bad so it doesn't catch all the colors and some paintings look crocked. Sorry!